open

“The door to the New Year is truly open now…this is a photo of mine just after the strong, cold wind blew it open as I stepped into the living room after arising late in the morning after last night’s festivities. Ok 2015…you’ve got my attention!”

I wrote those words on New Year’s Day, but I didn’t share that we had actually arrived home at 2 o’clock in the morning, hours earlier, to an open front door. That first time, I hurriedly ran to the back door to “let out the Old Year” as we’d always done growing up. I figured the New Year had been anxious to get in and had probably been having a high ol’ time in our house for a few hours, at least. Then when it happened again the next morning, I wondered if it was a sign? A sign other than the obvious one that our old door needs some attention?

Regardless of the door and the winds, it hasn’t at all been a bold or dramatic beginning to the New Year. My energy has been low and my spirit quiet. There are no big plans being made, I don’t have a word for the year (not that I ever do!: ), and I am happy to wait to for my goal-setting and calendar-filling to begin next week with the lovely business group I belong to.

All of my New Year’s clean-sweep energy thus far has been focused upon removing obstacles (mostly the tiny, frustrating, modern-world sort) and clearing the way…for what, I am not quite sure…that will come in its own time. For now, it feels just right to spend peaceful moments becoming aware of what hasn’t been working, and where the little stresses originate. Then making lists of how to make it all better. And finally taking step after tiny step on the list. It feels hopeful and good and just fine that it is all rather humble and tedious. There is nothing shiny or brave going on here, but it is exactly what I need to do.

I expect to spend much of January in this mode and will be sharing my process at Wisteria & Sunshine when I return to my regular posting rhythm there later this week. And together, there, we will move through the foundational things and eventually on to the more creative, interesting steps. So…no lovely photos yet of collages, or pin boards or daybooks. I am sure you don’t want to see photos of me deleting Pinterest pins and email inboxes, thwarting spammers and updating my computer. But there have also been Christmas walks and so much time spent enjoying our especially gorgeous tree. I don’t know if I will be ready to give it up when the Twelve Days of Christmas are over…it is so wild and beautiful! And some of the clearing has included finishing up the Christmas treats (nearly there!).

Now I recognize that I am enjoying a sort-of St. Distaff’s week, lots of rest and pleasure, with some determined accomplishment also going on. How nice that illness didn’t precipitate it, as it often does this time of year…just a longing to go through the door of the New Year a little less encumbered, with my mind lightened and my hands empty and open…

P.S. Just as I was typing those last words, the door flew open again!