Today is the fifth anniversary of The Bower.
All week, when I had a spare hour or two, I tidied up a corner here and there or rearranged a piece or two of furniture. I finally added all of the lovely places I visit to my “lovely places” page, added a search box which you will find on the “delve” page, a button in the right sidebar will now take you to my archives and a few other things were tucked here and there for you to find.
All by way of thanking you for reading and gazing and conversing.
but I always hold back a bit. The truth is (and today I seem only to be able to say what is very true) that the comments I receive in response to my posts are one of the delights of my life. And as I read at Alice’s blog:
“a multitude of small delights constitute happiness”
Charles Baudelaire
…the writing, the reading, the sharing of beauty, the humor, the making of friends…so many delights and, therefore, so much happiness to be found.
I asked my son Caleb if he had any recent photos of me, a certain someone having mentioned
that it might be time for a photo of the hens and me. This was the only one Caleb had. My first thought was “I must Photoshop out my belly.” My second thought was “Oh, everyone would see how much the well-house needs painting.” and “The fallen branch looks ugly.” and finally “And Juniper isn’t looking her best, either, in fact you can barely see her.”
Then I thought that I might just tell you that my belly is big because I have a fibroid there that
won’t go away but that I continue to try to heal (and I didn’t know that Caleb was taking my picture and so didn’t get to suck in my stomach!), and I am twenty pounds heavier than I like to be because since I became a caregiver I eat too much comfort food and don’t exercise enough, that that well-house has needed painting for more than a little while and we have many dead twigs and branches and whole trees around our garden and fields and that the woods are chock-full of them.
When I take another look at this photo, I see the table and chairs where we gathered with friends and family on Easter Day, and the sunlight on my hair, the buttercups spangling the grass, the cool splash of water from the pump and remember that I could smell the mint beneath my feet as I stood there.
It is all real…and I don’t know why it is so natural to edit and crop. Just this once at least, I will leave in my belly and post the photo of the eggs that has the droopy, yellowed onion grass (instead of the one where I tucked the distracting strands out of sight) and won’t reread this and tweak, but will just send it out to you from me. The me who is less flowery than she was five years ago, a bit more worn and tired, but still so happy to be here and hearing from you.
sarah April 30, 2011 at 5:45 am
I think you are beautiful – I have always admired your magical hair, your beautiful spirit, your lovely smile. I am sorry you have a problem with a fibroid and hope very much it doesn’t hurt.
I was going to come here to your place tonight anyway, as my daughter and I still use your forms in her homeschool, and it’s due time to print off some more 🙂 So this is a good opportunity to thank you for all you have done for us (our little homeschool) and the world in general through your generosity and beauty.
Dinahsoar April 30, 2011 at 11:58 am
Reality trumps edited perfection. Having lived in the woods I know first hand that the earth is not always tidy. But it is as it should be.
I enjoy reading your blog–thank you for the time and effort you put into it.
Being a blogger myself I know how time consuming it can be, and in fact am in the middle of a long break and considering discontinuing blogging. I much prefer to read blogs and am grateful for such as you who share their thoughts and life.
Lynn April 30, 2011 at 1:35 pm
You know what I thought when I saw that photo? I thought, “OH! That light and that setting remind me of the farm and environs in Kansas where my dad grew up!” Everything about it is beautiful, but most especially YOU.
But yes I know what you mean; when I posted a photo last night of me gazing wearily at myself in a hospital restroom mirror, I thought, “Should I explain that my face doesn’t usually look so puffy? That I ate almost an entire bag of Terra chips on the drive home the night before? And that that’s why I don’t really look as if I’ve lost 20 pounds, even though I have?” SIGH.
(Happy, happy anniversary, dear friend!)
Heather April 30, 2011 at 4:15 pm
Likewise, we are happy to hear from you – just the way you are!
Bonnie April 30, 2011 at 4:28 pm
Leslie,
YOU look beautiful!
I can smell the freshness and see the beauty. May the Lord bless you with
those beautiful moments with your mom, especially.
alice c April 30, 2011 at 5:47 pm
I am honoured to find my name in this lovely post. Congratulations on writing for five years – it is a tremendous achievement and must give you much happiness as you look back at the multitude of wonderful things that have created the life that you have lived in that time.
melissa April 30, 2011 at 8:59 pm
You’re such a sweetheart. I rarely put up photos of myself (I’m 52) because my neck seems to be aging ahead of the rest of myself…so thankful for turtlenecks. 🙂
As to your pictures, I love seeing you because you always look so cozy..and I’m so envious of you living out in the wilds. Love your browns and golden colors.
I love visiting…always a treat. 🙂
Melissa Wiley May 1, 2011 at 9:13 pm
Dear, dear Leslie,
I am so glad I happened upon your table at the homeschooling conference all those years ago, for I treasure your gentle warmth and earnestness. During those times when I’ve had to pare back my blogreading to just a few particular favorites, The Bower is always a keeper. And I look around my house and see your pretty garlands and framed quotes, and I’m so grateful for the beauty you have brought my way!
I love the pictures you have posted here. You make me so homesick for Virginia!
Warmly,
Lissa
Laurie May 2, 2011 at 2:10 am
Thank you for being real and soulful, and sharing yourself on this blog. It is one of my favorite places to go. I love your descriptions.. of water, and mint, of light and buttercups. You ARE beautiful, dear Leslie.
kkkkaty May 2, 2011 at 8:50 am
What more can I add to the comments already sent to you, all of which I heartily agree? I, too, am so glad you are doing what you are doing and sharing with us. Your words and perspectives are much appreciated. And being less flowery shows growth and means a lot more in the long run. Congratulations on a job well done.
I hope you have a lovely Mothers’ Day coming up soon.
Kathleen
Aunt Amelia's Attic May 4, 2011 at 1:36 pm
The sooner a woman learns to live with her reality, the better. ‘Cause as the years progress, only reality exists. 🙂
I have memories/photos of my cute, young self. But at 74, they are totally in the past.
But thankfully, I started working on this “necessity to accept reality,” when I was a lot younger than now. It has stood me in good stead.
You have many years to go, before arriving at my “olden” state. I’m so glad you have found the Wisdom, at such a young age.
Gentle hugs…