nursingmamasepia

This is a little post of Thanksgiving. During my annual exam three weeks ago, my nurse/midwife discovered a small lump. We made an appointment with a specialist and she suggested I go off caffeine and chocolate for awhile, and after some research, I added dairy to that list, as well. I spent the weeks of waiting keeping positive, but visiting the difficult possibilities now and then in my mind.

It seemed a good opportunity to think about my life and what is working and what isn’t….and to think about how I am nourished (no coffee and chocolate makes for interesting thinking in that area!) and how I nourish…to observe the ways I take care of myself well and the ways in which I don’t. I learned many helpful things. One thing that kept coming to me was how much I miss those lovely years of nursing my children. This is not a revelation to me…for years I have awakened from dreams of nursing little ones, tho’ I haven’t had the real pleasure for more than ten years. But how simple and profound to nourish in that way! And how much more complicated to nourish teen-aged sons. And to accomplish nourishing ones self in the midst of an increasingly full life.

I was supposed to see the specialist on Friday, but she had a surgery newly scheduled for that day and I was able to see her yesterday. As I waited for a few different procedures yesterday, I read the March/April Somerset Studios magazine (bought a few months ago, but not yet read…hmmm….). It was amazingly diverting and comforting and, yes, nourishing to read the detailed thoughts of each woman about her creative journey-with a single project or in a larger sense. I waited and read. I met the specialist-a joyous and thoughtful woman who is all one could want in a doctor who cares for our precious bodies. And I waited and read some more. And had a mammogram. And waited and read some more…..and got the good news that there was nothing to worry about with this little lump.

So I am sitting here typing, feeling grateful for my recent journey and its outcome. And also thinking of the woman who will be undergoing surgery tomorrow, and all the other women facing so many hard situations….and just wishing for whatever goodness can be had-for all of us.